


Robin Blue Egg

by Rahn (Rahndom)



Series: Tumblr Drables [1]
Category: DCU (Comics), Teen Titans (Comics)
Genre: Children, M/M, Magic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-01-17
Packaged: 2018-03-07 22:40:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3185900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rahndom/pseuds/Rahn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr Drable Fill for the prompt: How about the AU where Tim is in a relationship with Kon/Bart/both (OT3). The one were Tim gets hit by some stray magic, and a few days later wakes up with baby-sized robins eggs in his bed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dick gapes and Jason laughs his ass off as Tim tries – unsuccessfully at that – to hide his face between his hands and not to squirm on the bed because, really, how on earth had this happened again?

“Tim,” Dick whimpers, his eyes wide and his lower lip trembling.

“I’m not here,” Tim mumbles, his shoulders slumping. “I’m dying so leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”

Idly, he wonders whether he could smother himself with a pillow until he suffocates.

“Tim! Timtimtimtimtimtimtimtimtimtimtimtim!!” Bart cheers, zooming around the room in skipping, cheerful circles and Kon simply hovers over him with the most annoyingly smug smile on his face.

He wants to die.

“This must have been what Klarion had in mind when he said you were this team’s mommy, Tim,” Cassie musses, her eyes set on the two, perfectly shaped – if a lot bigger – eggs comfortably resting against Tim’s bare legs on the bed.

“I need to call Wally!” Bart beams, stopping just  a second to plant a wet kiss against Tim’s lips. “I’m gonna be a daddy!”

“Bart!” Cassie scolds, doing her best to stop her hyperactive team-mate. “We don’t know whether those eggs are yours!”

“But Tim laid them!” Bart argues, ignoring the way Dick seems to fall to his knees, sobbing over his precious ‘baby Tim’s innocence’ and Jason chokes on air alone as he continues to laugh.

“They could be mine for all we know!” Kon adds, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Hey!”

“What?”

“Tim!”

“No! Timmy~!”

Tim groans, his face coloring further.

“I don’t even remember laying an egg, let alone two!” he protests when Dick’s arms wrap possessively around him and the older man starts to glare at the two teenagers, growling low on his throat and threatening that none of them will get close to his baby brother again.

“Well,” Jason chortles. “You get hit by stray magic from Klarion no less, and then two robin eggs appear on your bed. I guess that’s pretty self-explanatory.”

“But Tim would have to have sex for these two idiots to be the fathers, don’t you think?” Dick tries, his lips trembling with emotion.  “And he wouldn’t have done it without consulting me first.”

Jason raises an eyebrow.

Bart and Kon avert their eyes, whistling.

Cassie rolls her eyes.

Tim sighs loudly.

Dick looks horrified.

“Tim!” he cries, tightening his arms around the younger teen. “No! You were supposed to be my pure and sweet baby forever!”

“I’m an emancipated minor, Dick,” Tim sighs. “I can make my own decisions by now.”

“B-but! How am I going to give you away at your wedding now!”

“I’m a guy too, you know?”

Cassie is relieved to see that Tim’s suicidal mania has now turned into a homicidal urge solely directed at his older brother – and it’s safer that way, right? At least Tim wouldn’t die that way – and that Jason has added two and two together and decided to vent his customary aggression on the two that have, apparently, deflowered their little baby bird, which, of course, prompts Bart and Kon to run away, hollering their love with quick: “BerightbackTimIloveyou!” and “Be a good mommy while we are gone, Rob!”

Which only makes Jason even more furious.

She sighs, deciding to end this madness altogether – it’s her turn to clean up the tower this weekend with Tim, but considering the situation at hand she will have to do it alone and is not in the mood to scrape Nightwing’s entrails from the linoleum – so she wraps her hands around Dick’s legs and proceeds to drag him out of Tim’s bed and room, ignoring his loud protests and simply calling:

“Try to rest a little, I’ll call Batman for you,” over her shoulder to Tim.

He nods gratefully, sinking against his pillows, his eyes landing again on his eggs and carefully pulling them against his side and under his arms.

“Tt, so it’s true,” a voice calls from his side, making Tim rolls his eyes.

“Not in the mood to fight with you, Damian,” he snaps, his arms tightening around his magically-induced progeny instinctively.

“I wouldn’t fight with you while you are in such a state, Drake,” Damian huffs, his eyes set on the blue eggs as he sits by Tim’s bedside and awkwardly pats his arm.

Tim blinks.

“What are you planning?” Tim has to ask, because Damian should be mocking him for his weakness, not looking at him like the answer to every single puzzle.

“I am not ‘planning’, as you put it, Drake,” the boy replies, his cheeks coloring softly. “I am simply stating my candidacy as your children’s godfather, considering the rest of our so-called family is definitely lacking in qualifications.”

Tim blinks.

Damian blinks back at him.

Tim wonders whether he can just jump from the top of the tower and land head first on the ocean. 


	2. Chapter 2

"Mommy," the child growled, chubby cheeks puffing as he crossed his short arms over his chest. "Jackie and I want Mommy."

 Dick’s face lost all its color, his hands immediately rising to defend himself when the toddler’s wide blue eyes regarded him seriously.

"Jay, baby, your mommy is saving the world right now" he tried to reason. "He’ll be home tomorrow morning and…"

 

"Jacky and I want Mommy," the child repeated, eyes frigid. "Now."

Dick turned to watch Jay’s twin, Jacky, who was currently sitting on top of his kitchen table, eyes wide and teary as he wrapped his own arms around his deformed teddy bear, lips curling into a pout that mirrored his brother’s.

“Mommy,” he whimpered, hands tightening until the stuffing was pulled out of his toy… again.

Dick sighed, realizing Jacky wasn’t about to provide help either.

Why had he agreed to look after the twins again?

“Uncle Damian would have brought Mommy back by now,” Jay said, sniffling, his nose in the air.

Dick sighed.

Right.

He had volunteered in order to prove he was a cooler uncle than Damian could ever be.

Damn it.

No wonder his younger brother had left for space with Tim and the others sporting that infuriating superior smirk of his as he went. He had known his godsons would pull a tantrum the moment they realized their Mommy wasn’t home.

Bastard.

He should have been the twins’ godfather!

He was the oldest, he had done his best to protect Tim from those two perverts and even worried over him during his… nesting. And yet Damian had pulled the rug from under him and got dubbed the godfather of their brother’s… hatchlings with an approving nod from Bart and a disbelieving smile from Kon citing that Dick was too coddling and Jason was ‘fuck mad’.

No matter.

He would prove that he was a better choice!

By the time Tim and the others came back the twins would adore him.

How hard could it be?

***

When Jason opened the door to Dick’s apartment, three hours later, he was expecting many things, but the warzone that met his eyes was not one of them.

Little Jacky was hovering in the air, his petite hands reaching for the cookie jar Dick usually kept hidden while Jay – fucking brat – was spinning Nightwing’s tied body around and around, laughing like the little maniac he was.

Dick had lost consciousness a little before, and therefore had stopped his frantic shrieks for help.

Jason sighed, shook his head and stepped out of the doorway.

“All yours, demon brat,” he muttered, crossing the wreckage that was the livingroom to tiredly crash on the couch.

Damian stepped in, arms crossed over his chest, and raised an eyebrow at the mess.

“Soldiers,” he said simply, straightening his back.

Both children stopped their mischief, eyes wide.

“Uncle Damian!” Jack cried, flying over to the older man to wrap his arms around his thick neck and peppering his cheek with childish kisses. “You are back!”

“And you owe your uncle Richard an apology,” he said simply, eyes hard, as he wrapped a careful arm around the toddler’s back to hold him in place and quickly grabbed Jay by the back of his t-shirt, lifting him off the ground.  “Explain yourself, soldier.”

Jay turned wide blue eyes on him, the picture of innocence.

“We were playing, Uncle Damian, swear!”

Damian sighed, walking towards the window.

“If I don’t buy that stupid doe look form your mother, what makes you think I would buy it from you, soldier?”

“I’m your favorite?” Jay tried, batting his eyelashes towards his idol.

Damian’s scowl deepened.  

Jason lit a cigarette when Dick whimpered, still hogtied to a chair.

“Rough night?” he asked.

“I’m gonna puke,” Dick whined, his face considerably pale.

“We just wanted Mommy, Uncle Damian,” Jacky explained, snuggling into his uncle’s embrace.

Jason rolled his eyes, opening the window for Damian.

“Your mother is downstairs,” Damian said, eyes amused.

The twins’ eyes widened in delight.

“Mommy!” they cried, leaping from their uncle’s arms and into the street below just in time for a tired and a little bandaged Red Robin to catch them, smiling.

“Did you kill your uncle Dick while I was gone?” he asked, enduring his children’s coddling and cuddling.

Both boys shook their heads.

“We don’t kill, that’s the rule,” Jay said, eyes wide.

“We don’t torture either, Jay,” Tim sighed, letting his nose card through his son’s dark hair.

“Umm,” Jack hummed. “Define torture.”

“Torture is like spending the whole summer with Ma’ in Smallville,” Bart chirped, wrapping his arms around Tim’s shoulders and kissing his neck.

The twins blinked in confusion.

“We love Ma’, that’s not torture,” Jay said, pouting.

“Without any electricity whatsoever,” Kon added, his own arm wrapping around Tim’s waist, his face resting on his shoulders and smirking when the toddler’s hands reached for his and Bart’s hair, their own turn at been cuddled was in order.

Jay’s and Jack’s eyes widened.

“You wouldn’t!” they cried.

“Behave around family and be good to your uncles is a rule as important as ‘don’t kill’,” Kon reminded his children, shaking his head.

“But uncle Damian said…” Jack tried, his eyes filling with tears.

“Remember rule number 5, kids,” Bart tried, smirking.

The boys lowered their heads.

“Uncle Damian is to be trusted but not believed entirely without further evidence,” they repeated in unison.

Tim’s smile widened.

“Up you two go, apologize to your uncle Dick,” he ordered, shuddering when Bart’s hand lowered sensuously from his shoulder and down his side and Kon’s reached innocently to his ass. “And tell uncle Damian you two will spend the rest of the day with him in order to better appreciate the subtle nuances of his words.”

“Yes, mommy,” Jack sighed, kissing his parents’ cheek noisily and grabbing his brother’s arm before floating back towards uncle Dick’s home.

Kon laughed.

Bart snickered. 


End file.
